Heightened Views of a Short Man III

I'm tired of telling y'all that the H.V.S.M series ain't a real post. It's been two weeks since my last post - I've been kinda ill.

Benue Housewives  ;)

I've been trying to expand my already large social circle but rather than let in any T.D.H I'm only gonna allow guys that are from Benue state... Whenever I meet some new guy, the first thing I ask him is, "Where are you from?" If he says, "Benue". I'm like, "We should be friends... good friends". :D

+ I've been trying to convince my female friends to marry guys from Benue.

You're probably starting to wonder what's so special about guys from Benue, shey? Well sometime ago, I overheard some women discussing, they were saying something about how Benue people are soooo hospitable; by that I mean whenever a (male) guest visits, they would offer their housewife as "Kola" to the guest :D

But the odd thing is that; in the wake of feminism and equality, we're yet to see Benue housewives go out in the streets to protest this strange culture.

Hmmm... could that mean that the Benue housewives sef like isheykushey?

FEMInism? Oh please!

I am not and would not be a feminist! Except if by feminism you mean the LOVE of women. Personally, I've had enough of this feminism talk (got dragged into an argument last week) and believe me when I tell you that women are such confused beings who don't know what they want! (You may drop your insults in the comment box)

They are quick to blame men for every societal ill. War, Crime, Rape, Illness, Economic meltdown, unanswered prayers, traffic jam... name it, and they'll place the blame on MEN. No one's talking about male victims of domestic violence or made-to-penetrate rape. A woman goes about in something less than clothes, a guy gawks looks and compliments <--- who does society blame?

Answer: the poor guy!

Even in relationships, the guy is expected to do virtually everything. You'll hear women say, 'I need a guy that will TAKE CARE of me".  Na me go toast you, na me go spend on Valentine, na me go spend on your birthday, my byday sef na me go spend join, na me go beg you make we marry, na me go still fund the wedding... Haba! Wetin you fit do?!

Let's assume I've got a Range Rover sports, deadly looks like Edward in Twilight, six packs and some biceps to show off like one Johnny Bravo in my class and the only time I can say I'm broke is when I've got like 6 figures in my bank account. Then the question I'll ask Bae is, "What have you got to offer?"

                                      A hole!?

Just a f*beep*ing hole between your legs! + the drama that goes with a relationship! Oh please!

I'd rather maintain a stable drama-free relationship with my right-hand and Vaseline.

P.S: Heightened Views of a Short Man (H.V.S.M) is a series I intend to keep writing as long as alcohol is cheaper than varsity textbooks. 

@Son_OfA_Witch